Ah, man. I have to tell ya, there were some gems yesterday. Gold, Jerry, Gold! I really, really enjoyed reading everyone's pitches. Thanks for sharing your ideas - I've already sent a couple of new proposals to my agent. Ha ha, I'm funny.
Okay, the winner of Day Two is... Karen Pellett. Congrats! (For those of you just joining us, read the official rules: CLICK HERE. Remember that all 5 days are included in the drawing for the Grand Prize, so it's never too late to enter each day.
By the way, the winners need to email me their mailing address. You can reach me here: authornonsense AT nonsensejamesdashner DOT com. Take out the nonsense and you'll have my email address. (ah, sometimes my cleverness amazes even me)
Hey, today is the day! Today is the actual day of the anniversary. August 27. One year ago I began The Dashner Dude. You should go back and read that post. It was really stupid.
Okay, on to today's topic. I especially enjoyed the ones that made me laugh yesterday (hence the really lame picture), so I want more of that. Today's assignment is easy: Write the silliest sentence you can possibly come up with. If you don't know how to be silly, that's okay, because your weak attempt will end up being just as funny. You can do it!
Here's mine:
Winky stinky pinky, bing bong boo, I love to eat gravy, but not on poo.
Have at it!
43 comments:
ok, i sincerly hope that i win the MzRnr! Congratz Karen Pellett on winning! that is so cool! well, heres my entry ^.^
"Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36pm traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19pm at a speed of 35 mph."
^.^
Good way to start us, JN. Love it!
This is stupid. I know it is. But stupid is another branch of silliness, right? :D
Ghosts are punny and this isn't funny, but I'm doing my best, so at 2:21 this afternoon I'll be dying of fright.
:D
Grandpa’s dentures fused with the microwave plate after Mike borrowed them one too many times to hold his omelet while it cooked.
"The peanutbutter paused on the way to the sandwich, finally identifying the wispers of his heart, and threw himself off the knife to be with his one true love, the floor."
Happy 1st Anniversary! May you write to many more.
"The shortage of argyle sock monkeys forced her to take legal action against Pairs R Us, the conglomerate international sock company hell-bent on taking over retail and fast-food chains in Winnapunctasocky, the capital city of puppetry and poetry."
Well, at least it's weird. Silly is the same as weird, right? Right.
The boy stopped between the kitchen and the T.V, so hungry and so bored, so he did the one solution: He ran to his TV, picked up a video game and stuffed it in his mouth happily.
Wow. That was strange to write.
Huggety huggety hug, Christian's not wearing a rug, hetty getter getter, and Christian feels better!
(This is one of the variations of what I say to my son if he's ever had a bump or a scrape and needs a quick first-aid hug.)
This isn't mine but it is one my sister and I used to say to eachother:
Inky winky stinky pinky flush it down the kitchen sinky ally oop ally oop doh winky--The king of France wet his pants right in the middle of the ballroom dance!
I'm not sure how to follow all these. . .
He dove into the book with all his heart, and then wondered why his head hurt.
Silly I know, but I'm not exactly a humorist.
As she contemplated the deeper meaning of cheese Tiffany let out a small grunt of frustration. Braiding one's toe hair wasn't as easy as everyone made it out to be.
Yippee Skippy fiddledee, hideeho and point at your knee
Yippee Skippy fiddledoe I don't want to watch blue clues no more
OK Really bad I know but I have a cold so I'm entertaining my daughter with Blues Clues.
In honor of all the chickens who gave their lives to feed James:
All the little chickies met behind the fence,
a few were quite excited but most were terse and tense.
Up in front a plate was full of food so finger-lickin'.
Then the leader stood and said, "It's true. We taste like chicken."
The silly willy billy goats jumped onto a boat; grew hungry and ate the boat, those silly willy billy goats.
O.K. Here is the fist day's thingamajig:
"I will tell you a story, My story, it is one of Plunder, Risk, Robbery, and Adventure, but alas it is only a story..."
I really can't think of one for today, maybe I'll be able to later...
Aaron Brower
Bippity, boppity boo,
A mouse ran into my shoe.
Bippity boppity bat,
It died.
(Okay, so I'm tired and I just want to enter for a chance to win.)
Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach gym.
I wrote this in High School. No, I have never been in jail.
Star light, star bright, first house I burn tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, escape the cops this very night.
"I'm gonna be rich! I opened a box of crackers, and found not one but two shaped like states. Colorado and Wyoming are going up on ebay tonight!"
ARRGGHH.... you are not making this easy, are you!
Here's a silly bit of a poem that I did not write. I have no idea where it came from, just that my dad used to always say it to us. Perhaps you've heard of it:
One bright day, in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys decided to fight.
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other!
I am a very serious and important person and cannot stand this nonsense.
"Dude, you just sold your freedom for cookies."
I once had a pet spider, but it turns out he was a biter; so when my arm became his snack, I had to give him a whack!
I like poo chocolate!
Kennen
Wink* Wink*
I once met a fella from Dooville,
Who hid from the folks down in Whoville.
He peeked ‘round the trees,
To see the Who’s sneeze,
‘Cause their do’s flounced and flopped clear to Snooville.
I think I got a one for today now, however horrible... I don't write "silly" stuff,
curse you!! may the hair on your toes become... uhh, smelly.
bad I know.
Aaron Brower
Yeah, I can't be silly on command but here's a very silly quote:
"When I travel through a big city and I see the dark, seedy underbelly of society,
I like to rub it because that makes society go to sleep. Just precious."
While sitting on the sofa in Grandma's parlor, she turned to the boys with glazy eyes and asked, "Are you boys getting off at the next stop?" :)
This sentence is funny, because the FDA says it is, and would a government agency lie to you?
Um, yeah, that was supposed to be it...
The Dashner dude
has got some 'tude
A great big head
from the books he's read
Filled so full
it might just . . .
*POP*
;D
I am moving, it's a craze; this box goes but that one stays, it's a pain in so many ways, I scratched Dashner's car today!
Maybe this one should've been anonymous... ;-)
And this one is from a blog entry I put up earlier this week. Should've occurred to me to add it first.
It was about as comfortable as sleeping on a Swedish SelectComfort mattress that had been thrown through a wood chipper and spread on an overturned rowboat.
Crystal, your book was so funny, I find it strangely comforting that you can't be funny on demand. Me neither.
Okay here's something not funny, but odd. An actual fortune from a cookie:
Let hatred turn into friendship because of your existence.
(I'm continuing the theme from yesterday...)
I said this silly sentence to my husband a while back: "You are like a chicken, with a cow for brains!"
Aw, thanks Melinda!!!
Alyssa, your comment reminds me of something I once said to my husband when I was on painkillers and was having a hard time explaining something:
"It's too hard to make . . . sentences!"
I am so not funny but I gotta enter anyway...
"We slipped through the night earlier that year, planting zucchini seeds in every garden in the neighborhood."
My favourite phrase I coined a year or so ago...
"We're not laughing at you... we're laughing about you!"
Feel free to use with my permission.
So it's midnight and I better think of something. How about this clasic brain bender:
Verla Mae threw up her hands in disgust.
I've already put in my sentence, but here's a couple of One Sentence Stories that amused me:
"In Target earlier today I learned there is really no good way to answer a 5-year-old asking you why you are looking at his mother's butt so much."
"It was one of those exams that you absolutely must pass if you want to continue in the program, and I failed the set-your-alarm-clock-properly portion."
Ode to Picnic at the Beach
Skinny suits with sandy slipper slops enjoy chicken salad on top.
Thank my two year old for slipper slops; they are her princess flip flops.
At this late hour,
my chance is poor,
I'm hoping James ignores
I'm posting on day four!
wombats are hunted by mountain yetties
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